• School can’t refers to a child’s genuine inability to attend school due to distress, trauma, or underlying issues rather than deliberate refusal or misbehaviour.
• Common causes include anxiety, bullying, undiagnosed learning difficulties like ADHD, dyslexia, dyscalculia, dysgraphia, and auditory processing disorder, which cognitive assessments can help identify.
• Parents should seek school refusal counselling when children show persistent signs such as tears before school, illness complaints, anxiety, or trouble transitioning back after disruptions.
• School avoidance counselling helps children through evidence-based therapies like CBT, trauma-informed approaches, family support, and collaboration with schools to build resilience and positive school experiences.

Summary:

School can’t is a term that describes when children are unable, rather than unwilling, to attend school due to underlying issues like anxiety, trauma, learning difficulties such as ADHD or dyslexia, or social challenges. Parents should consider school avoidance counselling when they notice persistent signs like tears before school, physical complaints, or difficulty transitioning back after breaks. Through school refusal counselling Melbourne families can access at Sureway Health & Wellbeing, children receive cognitive assessments, trauma-informed therapy, and evidence-based support that addresses root causes and helps them rebuild confidence for positive school experiences.

Outline:

• Introduction
• What Is “School Can’t”?
• What Are the Common Causes of “School Can’t”?
• When Parents Should Consider Counselling for “School Can’t”
• How Counselling Helps Children Navigate School Challenges
• Address “School Can’t” with Sureway Health & Wellbeing

As parents, few things are more distressing than watching your child struggle to get to school each morning. Their tears, anxiety, and pleas to stay home can leave you feeling helpless and uncertain about what’s really going on. 

The truth is, you’re not alone in this situation. Many Australian families are navigating similar challenges, and there’s growing recognition that what we’re seeing isn’t simply a child being difficult or disobedient. This phenomenon is known as school can’t.

We here at Sureway Health & Wellbeing understand that behind school can’t lies a complex web of emotional, social, and sometimes neurological factors that deserve our compassion and attention. 

Fortunately, through psychology and counselling support, children can find their way back to feeling safe, capable, and ready to engage with learning. This article explores what’s happening when children can’t get to school, why it happens, and how seeking professional support can make all the difference.

What Is “School Can’t”?

You may have come across the phrase school can’t on social media or in parenting conversations and wondered, “What is school can’t exactly?” 

Recently, there has been a growing shift away from the term “school refusal” because it suggests a child is choosing not to attend, when in reality, many children genuinely feel unable to go to school due to distress.

The concept of school can’t recognises that a child’s non-attendance is not misbehaviour or defiance. Instead, it reflects an emotional and physical response to stress, anxiety, or unmet needs. 

Children experiencing school can’t often try to protect themselves from feelings that feel too big or unsafe to manage, even if they cannot consciously explain why.

This experience exists continuously. It may begin as reluctance or irregular attendance and, without the right support, can progress to ongoing absence where a child cannot summon the emotional or physical resources to attend school. 

These children often need understanding, empathy, and trauma-informed support from families, schools, and mental health professionals.arity.

What Are the Common Causes of “School Can’t”?

There is no single reason a child experiences school can’t. In most cases, it develops from a combination of emotional, social, and learning-related factors that make school feel unsafe or unmanageable.

Common causes include:

• Social challenges
  Bullying, friendship difficulties, or feeling excluded can strongly impact a child’s sense of safety at school.
• Physical health concerns
  Ongoing pain, fatigue, or physical discomfort can make concentrating and participating in school difficult, and can also bring feelings of embarrassment or shame.
• Mental health difficulties
  Anxiety, depression, and emotional regulation challenges can make school attendance feel frightening or exhausting.
• Major life events
  Changes such as family separation, grief, or moving house can disrupt a child’s emotional stability.
• School transitions
  Transitions like moving from primary to secondary school can increase pressure and uncertainty.
• Undiagnosed learning difficulties
  Conditions such as Autism, ADHD, Dyslexia, Dysgraphia, Dyscalculia, and Auditory Processing Disorder can significantly increase school-related stress, particularly when a child does not yet understand why learning feels harder for them.

This is where cognitive assessments can be incredibly helpful. At Sureway Health & Wellbeing, assessments help identify learning differences and neurodevelopmental profiles so children and parents gain clarity about what is contributing to school can’t. 

With the right information, families can access targeted supports, adjustments at school, and therapy approaches that genuinely meet the child’s needs..

When Parents Should Consider Counselling for “School Can’t”

If you’re reading this and feeling anxious about your child’s behaviour, don’t worry. Some signs can be normal and temporary, especially during times of change or stress. 

However, it’s still important to be mindful of sudden changes in your child’s typical behaviour, particularly if the changes persist or worsen over time. Here are signs that it might be time to consider school avoidance counselling or school refusal counselling:

• Tears or strong emotions before school: This could happen before leaving the house or on the way to school
• Anxiety or fears about school: This could be specific to events at school, people, or situations, or it might be more general and “free floating”
• Somatic complaints before school: Headaches, sore stomachs, and tiredness that seem to appear on school mornings but not on weekends
• Difficulty settling the night before going to school: Trouble falling asleep, nightmares, or restlessness on Sunday nights or the evening before school
• Refusing to get out of bed, get dressed, leave the house, or get out of the car: Physical resistance to the process of going to school
• Trouble transitioning back to school after a period of disruption: Difficulty returning after school holidays, a period of illness, or a school camp
• Leaving class to attend the sick bay, or making excuses to avoid certain classes or people: Finding ways to escape specific situations at school

If you’re noticing several of these signs consistently, or if your child’s distress is escalating, seeking school refusal counselling in Melbourne can provide the support your family needs.

How Counselling Helps Children Navigate School Challenges

Professional counselling and therapy can be transformative in helping children overcome school can’t. These interventions address not only the symptoms but also the underlying causes, offering emotional relief and practical coping tools.

Through school avoidance counselling in Melbourne or online, children can be supported in several important ways:

• Building emotional awareness
  Therapy helps children identify and express feelings such as fear, sadness, or frustration in ways that feel safe and manageable.
• Managing anxiety and stress
  Evidence-based approaches such as Cognitive Behavioural Therapy help children understand anxious thoughts and develop calming strategies they can use at school and home.
• Strengthening self-esteem
  Counselling focuses on a child’s strengths and small successes, helping rebuild confidence and motivation over time.
• Supporting family relationships and parent coaching
  Family counselling helps parents respond with empathy while maintaining supportive boundaries that do not unintentionally reinforce avoidance.
• Healing from trauma or bullying
  Trauma-informed therapy allows children to process distressing experiences and regain a sense of safety.
• Working collaboratively with schools
  Counsellors can support communication between families and schools, helping create adjustments that prioritise emotional wellbeing alongside learning.
• Improving overall wellbeing
  Therapy often includes guidance around sleep, routines, and emotional regulation, supporting both physical and mental health.

Address “School Can’t” with Sureway Health & Wellbeing

At Sureway Health & Wellbeing, we understand how distressing school can’t can feel for both children and parents. Our experienced team provides school refusal counselling, school avoidance counselling, and comprehensive cognitive assessments to help families understand the underlying causes and move forward with clarity and support.

We work with children, teenagers, and adolescents through in-person appointments and telehealth across Australia. Families can access support at our Bundoora clinic and across Mill Park, Thomastown, Reservoir, Greensborough, Watsonia, Eltham, Diamond Creek, Northeast Melbourne, Diamond Valley and beyond.

Our welcoming clinics offer a calm, non-judgmental space where children feel heard and supported. Using age-appropriate approaches such as play therapy, creative activities, and gentle conversation, we help children build resilience and confidence at their own pace.

If your child is struggling with school can’t, early support can make a meaningful difference. Reach out to Sureway Health & Wellbeing today to explore psychology counselling and assessment options and take the first step towards helping your child feel safer, stronger, and more supported at school.

Sureway Health and Wellbeing psychology team provide services across the following locations: Bundoora, Mill Park, Thomastown, Reservoir, Greensborough, Watsonia, Eltham, Diamond Valley, North Eastern Melbourne and via telehealth Australia wide.

The post Understanding School Can’t: Why Children Struggle With School and When Psychology & Counselling Support can Help appeared first on Sureway Health and Wellbeing.

• Low self-esteem is a mental health issue that can impact people’s lives by affecting the way they feel, think, and behave.
• This condition can affect both children and adults and can be caused by various factors, such as abuse, social exclusion, career pressures, and relationship issues.
• Low self-esteem can manifest in different ways, such as negative self-talk, lack of confidence, social withdrawal, pessimism, and people-pleasing.
• Seeking mental health treatment and support from professional counsellors and psychologists can help  improve one’s self-esteem

Summary

Children and adults can develop low self-esteem due to various reasons, such as getting bullied, having unhealthy relationships, or performing poorly at work or in school. This condition is regarded as a mental health issue due to the way it can affect different aspects of people’s lives. Fortunately, people suffering from low self-esteem can improve their mental health and well-being through the support services provided by counsellors and psychologists.

Outline

• Introduction
• What Causes Low Self-Esteem?
• Common Signs of Low Self-Esteem
• How To Support Someone with Low Self-Esteem

Self-esteem is defined as the perception we have of our own worth. On the other hand, low self-esteem is characterised by a lack of confidence and feelings of inadequacy or worthlessness.

Since it can have a significant impact on our thoughts, feelings, and behaviours, having low self-esteem can have major effects on various aspects of our lives, such as our relationships, social interactions, and mental health.

Low self-esteem is regarded as a significant mental health issue due to its ability to impact people’s lives. Identifying the common signs of this condition is a crucial step towards supporting those who are suffering from it.  

What Causes Low Self-Esteem?

Before diving into the common signs of low self-esteem, it’s important to understand the various factors that can cause individuals to doubt their self-worth. experiencing neglect, constant criticism, or abuse as a child can cause a person to develop feelings of inadequacy, powerlessness, and unworthiness.

Getting bullied and socially excluded can also diminish the way kids view themselves, leading to feelings of inferiority and dissatisfaction as they get older.  

Adolescents and adults can also develop low self-esteem due to academic or career pressures, relationship problems, and mental health conditions. Cultural and societal factors can also influence how people view themselves. For instance, societal standards on beauty can cause individuals to develop body image issues, which can lead to low self-esteem.

Common Signs of Low Self-Esteem

These factors can have a lasting effect on how individuals perceive themselves, causing them to develop low self-esteem as they get older. Since this condition can lead to other serious mental health issues, such as anxiety and depression, it’s important to identify its warning signs early on. Below are some of the common signs of low self-esteem.

Negative Self-Talk

Having low self-esteem can cause people to constantly criticise their selves and resort to using self-deprecating comments. They also tend to downplay their success and achievements and instead focus on what they perceive as their failures.

Lack of Confidence

Due to their feelings of inadequacy, people with low self-esteem often feel uncertain about their abilities, and they also lack the confidence to act or make decisions on their own. As a result, they tend to avoid trying out new experiences due to their fear of failing.

Social Withdrawal

Since these individuals have negative perceptions of their selves, they believe that other people also view them in the same way. As a result, they feel uncomfortable in social situations, causing them to prefer being alone to interacting with others.

Pessimism

People with low self-esteem also generally have a negative outlook on life, and they often expect the worst to happen. Because of this, they usually doubt their ability to accomplish their goals or resolve certain situations.

People-Pleasing

Going out of their way to please others at the expense of their personal needs is also a common sign of low self-esteem. Individuals with this condition also find it hard to say no to the requests of other people.

How To Support Someone with Low Self-Esteem

If you, a loved one, or a friend is exhibiting the signs mentioned above, there are a couple of things that you can do to support others or improve your self-esteem. For example, encouraging positive self-talk can help boost one’s self-esteem by reframing negative thoughts with positive affirmations and focusing on strengths and achievements.

Promoting self-care by indulging in enjoyable and relaxing activities, such as hobbies and physical exercise can also improve one’s mood. In addition, when supporting other people with low self-esteem, it’s important to be an empathetic listener by listening to their thoughts and concerns wholeheartedly without offering unsolicited advice or dismissing their feelings.

Seeking professional help from a counsellor or psychologist is also an effective way of dealing with low self-esteem since mental health professionals are trained to provide personalised solutions tailored to their clients’ needs and recovery goals. 

If you’re not yet comfortable visiting a mental health clinic in person, we offer telehealth mental health counselling services to ensure you can receive professional help from the comfort of your home. This service provides a safe and private way to address your mental health needs without the need to travel.

For those who prefer in-person support, we have various services available across Australia, including NDIS psychology counselling and other tailored supports. Our clinics are conveniently located in Melbourne, Eltham, and Bundoora, making it easier for you to access the care you need.

We provide in-person and telehealth psychology and counselling services to help those with low self-esteem and other mental health conditions. Through our services, we help our clients access affordable, professional, and high-quality personalised solutions aimed at creating positive changes in their lives.

Get in touch with us today to start your journey towards living a healthier life. Explore our latest articles packed with valuable advice and practical tips!

Sureway Health and Wellbeing psychology team provide services across the following locations: Bundoora, Mill Park, Thomastown, Reservoir, Greensborough, Watsonia, Eltham, Diamond Creek, Northeast Melbourne and via telehealth Australia wide.

The post Understanding Low Self-Esteem: Common Signs and How to Recognise It appeared first on Sureway Health and Wellbeing.